Disneyland Dads¹

Like half the members of my generation, I am the product of what used to be called a "broken home." My parents divorced when I was eight. I lived with my mother and saw my father on alternate weekends and two weeks during the summer. ²

My father, like many of his generation, is a classic Disneyland Dad. The Disneyland Dad is usually found at malls, little league fields, upscale pizza restaurants and ice cream parlors. He is usually accompanied by a child busily eating food forbidden by Mom, wearing new clothes, or playing with expensive toys.³ The Disneyland Dad dispenses cash like an ATM and provides an endless supply of quarters for arcade games. Whether they are motivated by guilt, frustration, or an inability to parent, Disneyland Dads substitute material items for fatherly advice, guidance, and discipline.⁴

While my mother furnished the hands-on, day-to-day parenting, my father remained distant. My mother monitored my eating habits, my friends, my grades, even the programs I watched on television. But without daily contact with my mother, my father found it difficult to make decisions about my upbringing. He was afraid of contradicting Mom. So he showered me with gifts and trips. He expanded my wardrobe, gave me my first pieces of real jewelry, introduced me to Broadway shows, and took me to Disneyland - but he did not help me with school, teach me about the job market, give me insight into boys, or allow me to be anything more than a spoiled consumer.⁵

Like most of my friends, I came to view my father as more of an uncle than a parent. He was a beloved family figure, someone who could be counted on for some extra cash, new clothes, a pizza. And like most of my friends, I was troubled by the gulf that widened between my father and myself. I talked, argued, and made up with my mother as I went through my teens. Both of us changed over the years. But my father remained the same - the generous but distant Disneyland Dad.⁶

The Disneyland Dad is a neglected figure. While books and daytime talk shows focus on the plight of single moms, few people offer advice to the fathers. Men in our society are judged by success and conditioned to dispense tokens of their achievement to their children. We kids of divorce want all the things the Disneyland Dad can offer, but we really need his attention, his guidance, his experience, his mentoring.⁷ Someone has to help Disneyland Dads become fathers.⁸

Question for Review and Revision

1. Does this essay provide a full definition of an invented term? Can you state the thesis in your own words?
2. Where does the writer "define" Disneyland Dads, and where does the writer "describe" them?
3. Where does the writer use narration and comparison to develop her thesis?
4. Can you detect any awkward passages that could be more clearly stated?

Key to Highlighted Passages

1. The title introduces an invented term. Some writers provide definitions of existing words or concepts, such as addiction or child abuse. This writer invents a term, then explains its meaning.
  (back)
2. The writer begins by briefly establishing her background. Since the focus is her father, she does not provide many specific details about the rest of her family or even her own reactions to her parents' divorce.
  (back)
3. Description of Disneyland Dad.
  (back)
4. Thesis statement that clearly defines the term "Disneyland Dad."
  (back)
5. Contrast between what her Disneyland Dad provided and what he did not.
  (back)
6. Shows contrast between her evolving relationship with her mother and the static relationship with her father.
  (back)
7. Contrasts wants and needs of children.
  (back)
8. Concludes essay with a persuasive call for action, blending definition with an element of argument.
  (back)